Scratch marks

fuckyeahthefall:

ENGLISH SCHEME (1980)

O’er grassy dale, and lowland scene
Come see, come hear, the English Scheme.
The lower-class want brass, bad chests scrounge fags [1]
The clever ones tend to emigrate
Like your psychotic big brother, who left home
For jobs in Holland, Munich, Rome
He’s thick but he struck it rich, switch:
The commune crap, camp bop, middle-class, flip-flop
Guess that’s why they end up in bands
He’s the creep-creep in us all
Condescends to black men
Very nice to them
They talk of Chile while driving through Haslingden
You got sixty hour weeks and stone-toilet back gardens
Peter Cook’s jokes, bad dope, check shirts, fancy groups
Point their fingers at America.
Down pokey quaint streets in Cambridge
Cycles our distant spastic heritage [2]
Its a gay red, roundhead, army career, grim head
If we was smart we’d emigrate

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Notes:
[1] For the benefit of any American followers ‘fag’ is Brit vernacular for ciggies. ‘Scrounge’ is like the casual form of ‘plead’. ‘Bum’ is also used in this context. So you may well be accosted by a fellow smoker asking, ‘can I bum a fag off you mate?’. Honest.

[2] Cambridge & Oxford (‘Oxbridge’) are where the priveleged elements are groomed to take up their positions at the head of government, media, etc.